this link will change your life and why are you even waiting to read?

SPECIAL "NO FRILLS" EDITION:

(this is not like "New Edition"... they are not even still together).

a site for all you manly men out there:
for manly men only

The REASON I am posting this... i don't even know why I am posting it... i saw a link to an article titled, "What Her Underwear Says About How She Is In Bed" (sorry for the X-rated nature of this post), and i wanted to read it to see what my underwear blabs about me.

sadly, i did not get to read the article. i read the beginning, and then under the portion that states, "Read more!," there was not an active link. so lame.

WARNING: On the site, there are disturbing pictures of random, nameless women wearing underwear,
for no apparent
reason.
So, if you ARE a guy, then the site is your best friend.

it is slightly funny, even if you are not a guy.

So, I heard on the radio about a song called "THE FRIDAY SONG." Supposedly it was sung by a Miss Rebecca Black.

I checked it out on You Tube (the site needs a name change... whose "YOU TUBE" is it???????????????????).

I did not hear the sound... so I did not know if everyone's comments that it was the "worst song in the world" were true.

However, judging by Rebecca Black's outfits, and the clothes of her friends in ugly, prom like dresses, I suddenly, and in a "snap judgement" way, am deciding that it probably is the "worst song in the world."

here is link:
Rebecca Black's Cheesy Video

I would not hang out with her on a friday night.

(even though I am blogging on friday night).

yours truly, Gentle Readers,
(check out the link to The Magnet Project, please... then click on like, please!)

Alice
or, n.d.h.

Wow. Something I NEVER Would Have Thought Of

dear self-defense class taking readers:

I was in the Run On! Richardson store today.
I noticed a small can of pepper spray (it is made by "Sabre") that is made in a shade of pink, to promote breast cancer awareness. (Just so you know, I stopped and stared.
But mostly I was thinking, "WHY????")
JUST What I Wanted.
Now, if I am ever fighting off an attacker in the future, the attacker will most likely be thinking, "she is SO aware about diseases that currently affect American women!"

I was adding to my record collection and bought a Rod Stewart album.

Because INQUIRING MINDS want to know.

give love, peace, hope and luck

Alice

n.d.h.
(Also, please view my facebook site for The Magnet Project on the right side. Thank you).



Here is a link if you would like to buy, or see what I'm talking about:
weird pepper spray

(So, still buy pepper spray... but I'm pretty sure ANY pepper spray will do).

I notice that you got it... you notice that I want it... I write this on a grave note

"I Notice That You Got It

You Notice That I Want It

You Know That I Can Take It To The Next Level Ba-by !

If You Want This Good Bitch (?) (Huh)

Sicker Than The Remix

Baby Let Me Blow Your Mind Tonight"

Dear balanced-diet readers:

Yes, those were actual lyrics from a Britney Spears "song," called Till the World Ends.
"Keep on Dancing Till The World Ends" is the other refrain.

Even though I have heard this song incessantly...

I am not going to explain why people should not listen to Britney Spears or why the song DOES NOT HAVE A REASON TO EXIST. (Yes, it was written by Kesha).
Actually, you can listen to Britney all you want.

Simply put: Doesn't Britney know that the world ended on May 21 ????????????? (question mark overload).
So, Britney is either: REALLY BEHIND, or just a futurist.

If people really decide to dance "until the world ends," that is going to get really tiring.

To Britney: HIT ME BABY, ONE MORE TIME.


Also: I found 1/2 of a penny the other day in a parking lot. I left it there, in my puzzled state.

I am either somewhat lucky, or God is sending me a mixed message.

with pain in my heart,

Alice


n.d.h.

Tell a friend about this blog and receive... Nothing. Nada. ZILCH.

the texas theatre

The picture above is of the Texas Theatre in Oak Cliff, in dallas.
taken May 11.


alice

My Clueless Moment

Dear Gentle and also Aggressive readers:

Before My Clueless Moment, I must share the following. You can call it a jealous moment.
Inside a Mexican hair salon today, I quickly glanced at the TV. There was a TV show on called Se Vale, (it is the first time I have seen it. The link is below. It is on Televisa):
Se Vale T.V. show
So, you are probably wondering WHY is n.d.h. writing about: some cheesy show?
Because I was momentarily transfixed by what I saw.
On the screen there was an Asian woman in a sparkly, clingy black leotard doing gymnastics inside a huge ring, with a big smile on her face that said: "EVERYONE should do gymnastics inside a huge ring... if you don't, there is something wrong with you."

Although I briefly wondered, "why does this show even exist??????????????????????????????" ( question mark overload ), I was briefly jealous of the flexible Asian woman, and I WANTED TO DO GYMNASTICS INSIDE A HUGE RING.
My Clueless Moment:
I was standing outside with a couple of neighbors(during a HUGE storm with hail), when one of them started talking about a drink.
I believe that it was called the "Gorilla Fart" (I do not make this stuff up!)
The neighbor stated that the makers of the drink usually put Wild Turkey in it. Apparently Wild Turkey is a type of Bourbon, and I did not know that.
A man in his late 30's or early 40's, who wears 2 earrings, drives a convertible and lives in the next building, put his hand on my shoulder and said, "You Don't Drink That Much, Do You, SUGAR?????????????"
I think I laughed. However, in hindsight my clueless moment would have been slightly funnier if I would have said: "not everyday, like you," which is actually what I was thinking.
The man in his 30s or 40s went on to say that he and his friends are "lushes on the weekends."

Again... I do not make anything up.

I would tell you what I have been listening to, but unfortunately I keep hearing a Rihanna song OVER and OVER...
maybe I will switch to classical.

Why not send a friend the north dallas homegirl link as a FUN surprise. you can do it right now.

Love,
your devoted blogger,
Alice

5 hour energy ... Did You Drink Yours Today ?

GENTLE READERS:

Here is my random story for May 17. Call it TUESDAY MOANIN' if you must:
Last Wednesday I was in The Learning Center (a tutoring place) at Richland College. A tired student who was waiting for a Writing Tutor came and sat near me.

He was kind of chubby, black, and maybe 20 years old. He was wearing TOO much cologne. He said he was "from London."
A few minutes later he began talking to one of the Writing Tutors. While commenting about what he had consumed that day, he said, "Someone gave me this," and pulled out a small bottle of 5 Hour Energy. He said it was the first time he had had it. The Writing Tutor (a lady in her 40s, with a conservative, weird haircut) told the chubby man the 5 Hour Energy "clogs your arteries," which I don't think is totally accurate.

So, bringing the focus back to me:
I was thinking, who gave the chubby London man the 5 Hour Energy? If it was a friend, who just hands out bottles of 5 Hour Energy to their friends? Who hands out bottles of 5 Hour Energy to ANYONE? He said it did not taste good.

I guess he was still thirsty. A few minutes later, the chubby guy saw me drinking a diet Dr. Pepper and asked me if I wanted to buy him a drink (Silly Question). I said, "NOT REALLY!!" and then, "do you want to buy me one?"
The 5 hour energy drinker said, "I don't have any money." Maybe that is why someone gave him the drink in the first place ...

I am listening to: Julian Casablancas, and have been hearing some strange 80s tunes lately... usually I am surprised for 2 seconds and then I realize I really like whatever the hit is.

as always gentle readers,

yours truly

alice

n.d.h.

"somos muchos chilangos" 3:30 p.m. today

3:30 p.m. today, while at a stoplight, this is what I viewed on the back of a RED volkswagen GTI (I did not even know that car existed):

"SOMOS MUCHOS CHILANGOS"
For the spanish-impaired, the translation for the day is " we are many from mexico city."

Go write this down:
a Chilango is someone who was born in Mexico City (basically, someone who is from Mexico City). So, I almost laughed to death after I saw the sticker. Maybe there are many Chilangos in Dallas that I don't know about???????????????????????????????? (question mark overload).

Since I do like mexico city, I leave you with this thought,

"Me encantan los chilangos." Again, write it down, or, ask the person who cuts your lawn to translate. Por favor !

I was listening to Kesha earlier.

Okay, before you read this, remember: when does this blog ever REALLY make sense ?

Having said that, a couple of her songs were really "inspiring." I wish not to explain. But you can check out her latest CD if you like. The CD is "Animal."

Even if you like, DO NOT copy her fashion sense.


I'm Audi 3000,
(i used to use that phrase like 20 years ago. ha ha)

hasta luego,
Alice

b.b.b.

***** to the wall

Dear everyone, even my reader (notice it's SINGULAR)

in Russia:

It's kind of a crude post, but as usual it must be said:
A tale of confusion: a few weeks ago, I was sitting in a study area at Richland College, and i heard a man in his 20s say to his friend:

" I woke up, and it was balls to the wall. " The guy had been talking animatedly to his friend.

OKAY...

I don't even know how to write "Okay.." in this post the way I was thinking it that day. It's more like, Okaaaaaaaaaaaay.
I do not know what it means. Either he was in a hurry that morning, or someone literally put that body part on the wall for him.
So, Gentle Readers, if you would like to enlighten me, that is fine.
I did not ask the animated guy that day, but I did do a double take. I kept listening, but no more gems were in that conversation, sadly.

Also: a couple (or so) weeks ago, I saw a high school girl walking to the bus stop. She was carrying a styrofoam cup that looked like it had coffee in it. I drove along, gripped with curiosity...
WHO DRINKS COFFEE IN HIGH SCHOOL ?
I did not drink coffee until college. I was thinking, is this some kind of new trend ??????????????????????????? (question mark overload).

N.d.h. is confused: was she trying to look cool, or does she really enjoy the delicious coffee?
Anyway, I sort of stared and drove off, it was really awkward !

But this is all straight from the daily GRIND. Do you get it ?

Whatever that means. Don't ask me, I am just the blogger.

Luv,
Alice

(n.d.h.)

New contest coming soon !